CAUSE YOU'RE AS CLOSE
as my very next breath
NOFAA
Beatific Hodge Podge
nineteen
Republic Polytechnic
3rd year
Material Science
what time is it now?
it's 2PM!
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Credits: In is awesome ;)
Friday, May 30, 2008, 2:14:00 PM
again, i saw you walked past by.. again, it made me melt inside.. wearing all black, was enough to make me mesmerized..
you are my drug, and now, im high...
NO games, i want you exclusive..
Thursday, May 29, 2008, 12:33:00 PM
Although we’ve come to the end of the road
Still I can’t let you go
It’s unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you
Come to the end of the road
Still I can’t let you go
It’s unnatural, you belong to me, I belong to you
8:51:00 AM
had my first pactical lesson yesterday.. one word, FUN..i had to drive on the road with other drivers after half an hour of sitting in the car going around the carpark.. my face was very tense because i was wondering, what if i hit another car, or worse, someone? but luckily the driving instructor understand and he made some jokes to loosen up the situation. but overall, i think i did alright.. well, aside from the vehicle stalled for a few times at the traffic light because i release the clutch too early, heh..
but it was fun, and it stroke me a couple of times, hey, im driving yo! haha..
Monday, May 26, 2008, 3:17:00 PM
Life is such a crazy thing
It's never really what it seems
Cause first we were chillin
Now I'm catchin feelins
Can you tell me what this means
I'm going through my voicemail
And I'm saving every message you sent
I'm tryna reading between the lines
To see if there was somethin' I missed
All of a sudden, my vision became so clear.
Everything I needed was right here,
Before me
So pressed to let you know
Just how you make me feel
Never had a feeling thats so real
Control me
Don't wanna play no games,
I want you exclusive,
Baby, we should just do this,
with the feeling's so strong,
how can we go wrong
No games, I want you exclusive
theres no more excuses
the feelings so right
I want you boy, I need you boy
I really love your company,
Hate it when you gotta leave
another oppurtunity, for me to say everything.
So tell me if i'm buggin,
when you look at me like that.
I wanna say something,
but I dont know how your gonna react.
Don't wanna play no games,
I want you exclusive,
Baby, we should just do this,
with the feeling's so strong,
how can we go wrong
No games, I want you exclusive
theres no more excuses
the feelings so right
I want you boy, I need you boy
I want you exclusive,
Baby, we should just do this,
with the feeling's so strong,
how can we go wrong
No games, I want you exclusive
theres no more excuses
the feelings so right
I want you boy, I need you boy
11:46:00 AM
when you know you like someone, you will go all out to find out more about that particular person.. you will be his/her stalker day and night.. you will go to their blogs, friendster, myspace, youtube, even their friend's pages because you just want to see their picture..ouh ya, i have been doing this for a few weeks now and it's weird, like how can i spot you within the first 10 seconds even if there's 30 plus people in the picture or video. how can i spot you in that very blur video just by the way you move or walk or even your hands movement.. how can i know that's you even though i just know you? how can i see your distinct features even though it has just been a few weeks?
8:44:00 AM
i know i've been living in denial.. i could not accept the fact that there's no you and i.. i want to forget what i saw that day.. i just want to push it away, but everytime i think about you, memory creeps back.. and i hate what i saw.. i seriously wanted to get away from there, but it will be too obvious and i dont want other people to ask.. i kept quiet but my heart was pounding with jealousy.. you were not even there to thank me or even say goodbye. now i ask, was all that worthwhile? standing for hours, just to see you. waited even though i was so tired, just for you?shit, i hate this feeling. i even more hate it when the feeling's depleting..
Thursday, May 22, 2008, 2:19:00 PM
i saw you having fun with your friends, i saw your big smile, sparkling eyes..seeing your smile, make all of these worthwhile..
and i like what i see..
but, i can only admire you from far..
1:52:00 PM
i told myself time and time again that this is real. and it IS real..
so everytime there's an opportunity to see you or even hear about you, i'll grab it..
i know, i want it.. i want you..
im in __. hee..
Tuesday, May 20, 2008, 11:52:00 AM
watched ayat-ayat cinta for the second time yesterday with mum and aunt. cried like nobody's business.. then later in the afternoon watched qabil khusyry qabil igam on suria.. again, cried like nobody's business.. i think that i have been crying more nowadays.. dont ask me why.., i myself dont know.. what i know is i will feel the urge to cry.. and i will cry immediately after that.. errr, i know, weird.. haha..oh god, i know im missing someone badly..
Thursday, May 15, 2008, 10:33:00 AM
i saw him walked past by with his friend when i was queueing for drinks. i was praying to meet him today as i miss him so.. one sight of him is enough to make me go oooohhhhhhhhhh.. called marni because i was so excited.. and you guys know how i will be like if i get excited right?then when i was walking back to my seat, i saw him walking back, he was laughing, and again, it made me go ooohhhhhh.. he looked so cute when he was laughing.. you can hardly see his eyes and his face will go red.. thank god i did not accidentally let go of my drinks.. my legs were very wobbly, my stomach twisted and my heart pumping.. now i cant get these feelings out.. and i know i want him badly..
Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 3:10:00 PM
i really dont know how to express it.. i cant put it in words.. i thought it's just an infatuation.. but no, it's not.. i think im in ___. and i like what im feeling... =)ingin ku teriak, aku cinta kamu!
9:48:00 AM
after the tenth page, at last, i've found it! i've found the quote that i have been looking for weeks!! and the source? from 'his' page! how cool is that?? such a coincidence!!!---------------------------------------
Felix: Brooke, just talk to me. Just tell me how you feel. I know it's scary and I know you had a hard time with Lucas. But just tell me if you can show me your heart. Because if you do, I'll guard it with my life. Just say okay.
Monday, May 12, 2008, 2:49:00 PM
ayat-ayat cinta is THE movie to watch.. it's that good that i dont mind my blocked nose or sniffing like hell as i was too mesmerized..i will definitely watch it again..
even though i dont really like watching religion-based movie but ayat-ayat cinta just open my eyes.. maybe the environment was so familiar and when i hear people conversing in arabic, i just enjoyed because i used to speak in arabic, just like them.. and sometimes, i miss speaking in arabic even though my arabic is hopeless..
overall, i give it a 10.. i love i love i love..
oh, there was this one time when aisha told fahri to record his voice and she told him to say 'i love you' to maria.. instead, he said i love you in arabic to aisha, nasy and i went, ooohhhhh... fahri is THE guy that every girl would want.. yum yum..
tidak akan ada mesir jika tiada sungai Nil.
you are my egypt and but you have already found your Nile.. and it's not me..
Tuesday, May 06, 2008, 9:13:00 AM
i had a blast yesterday! went to seoul garden with duplie. we were late for the for the student BBQ meal and ended up getting the normal adult dinner. but as i had my cravings for weeks, i cant wait any longer! but as always, i was really really full by the end of it.-----------------------------------
ok, so i am going to post about something quite personal. it's been bugging me for months but i just cant put it in words. i've talked to some friends but i am still not satisfied. i may offend some people but these are just my views. you may have your own views or even excuses but this is how i feel. yes, i am going to touch on friendship. i have met a lot of wonderful friends whom i really treasure. we may fight or give each other the silent treatment but after all that, we all know we can't live without each other. but i am not going to talk about the wonderful friends i've got, i am going to talk about this group of people whom they claimed as my friends but went M.I.A after they got what they want from me. i may be gullible and i trust people quite easily, but that does not mean that you can take advantage of me. sometimes i feel like a bus stop. you only need a bus stop when you want to ride a bus so you have to wait there. untill your bus arrives, you will just wait for it at the bus stop. but when your bus arrives, you will leave the bus stop. and the cycle continues without stop.
and it's the same just like how you've treated me. after you got what you wanted or informations you needed, you went M.I.A just like that. if you really regard me as your friend, would you even do that to me? i'm not a friend with benefits, don't treat me that way. i dont need it.. so what if you have a girlfriend?? we can still be friends right?
here are some scenarios. there's this big-headed, self-centered freak who thinks that the world revolves around him. you only call me when you have a new song or video or whatever shits that i sometimes can't be bothered with. but after that, you went missing from time to time. what the hell you take me for? i don't even care about all your bullshits so you don't have to tell me anymore! when i called, you didnt answer. i know you are working but does it take DAYS to ring me back? with me, you only talk about yourself. when i asked, how are you? you replied fine but didnt ask me back. what happened to the classic, oh-im-fine-how-about-you? just to play nice for a moment? it's been a while since you last called just to say hi. would it hurt just to call me for a moment and ask me how i am instead of talking about you, you, and more you??
and another fella, hey, i dont have anything against you but i just dont like how you have treated me. you asked how i am but i know that's not your real agenda. it's because your ex happened to be a good friend of mine. you asked how she is, how she's been coping with her life and how is her relationship with her boyfriend, i talked to you, consoled you. but what for? just for you to take advantage of me? i listened to your problems. i helped you, advised you. but after you realised that she was not whom you've waited for, you went M.I.A.. when i know something's not right, i smsed you to ask what happened between you guys, but you scolded me and snapped back at me, saying you dont even want to hear her name and dont want me to talk about her ever again. who gave you the right to snap back at me? i was trying to be a caring friend but you just dont realised that. you thought i was being nosey of your freaking pathetic life. i haven't heard about you for almost a year now and i always wondered, did you only take me as a friend because you wanted to know more about your ex? get a life sucker!
and there's another fella who i just feel like slapping. i may not know him personally but his a friend's friend. i know both of you are platonic friends. when you left her to be with your girlfriend, she was damn hurt. but if things werent meant to be between you guys, it's not my problem. but what hurts her more and definitely making me want to slap you was when you totally ignored us completely. it's ok if you dont call or text but you did not even say hi when we bumped into you last time. you didnt even see us eye to eye. not even a smile. it's as if we never exist in your life before. and when you actually text her, it was because your birthday was nearing so you expected her to wish you. and i thought i have met the most self-centered guy ever! and i still remember, early last year, you called her, crying that your girlfriend dumped you. she consoled you and wanted to meet up the next day. but plans changed when your girlfriend suddenly turned up. when we walked past you, you ignored us completely. what kind of a friend are you? taking advantage of people.
again, these are all my views and feelings. you may have your own perspectives but one thing for sure, i will think twice if you come knocking on my door again. i dont want to be treated the same way again.
Friday, May 02, 2008, 9:44:00 AM
we had lab session last week.. it was so much fun as it was our first.. we laughed, shouted and took pictures and even danced in the middle of the class.. the substitute faci could not do anything.. heh..
lost alien / mad scientist / parking attendant..
had sushi with kona and duplie on monday.. we were full by the end of it.. met In on tuesday.. to apply my PDL but unfortunately the office was closed by the time we arrived..
had breakfast at mcdonalds just now with syidda. met tajes afterwards..
im craving for seoul garden right now.. =(